Perfectly Imperfect
by Zoti21
Summary: All characters mainly DW. "Life is what happens when you're busy making plans." J.Lennon This is a story about life, dealing with what is dealt to you and living in the moment.


Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters and I thank J.K.R. for this wonderful world she has created. This is post GOF and pre OOTP and will not be perfect… just like the title.

Chapter One: Restless Nights

Ginny Weasley was dreading the end of summer marking the commencement of her fifth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, something she had feared even more then the end of summer. She couldn't pinpoint when this feeling started. It seemed like it had been living inside her for as long as she could remember. All Ginny could truly make sense out of it all was the overbearing sensation that this year things were going to be different.

She had tried all summer, as she lay awake at night, unable to sleep, to convince herself that change was a good thing. Tonight was no different as Ginny lay wide-awake staring at her ceiling. She huffed and turned over in bed as she tried to let sleep take over. Ginny tried talk herself in to accepting the coming changes she would have to face. That despite the fact Fred and George would be leaving after the school year was out that she still had Harry, Ron and Hermione. However, she was failing miserable at that notion. Mainly, because she knew this was a lie. It was eating her up inside knowing the golden trio would leave her, poor little Ginny, to go fight Voldermort. This was the inevitable and unspoken truth.

Nothing ever had to be said between the lot of them because it had always been coming to this. It was silly not to accept that notion. That from the moment Voldermort started this mess this could only be their fate. Maybe it had been harder to see or just easier to ignore before. Before, as kids without a care in the world at Hogwarts just trying to escape the taunting and hardships of teenage life. But now, without a doubt, it was undeniable, lingering in the back of all their minds. All they could do was pretend to be teenagers a little longer while they waited. It was the calm before the storm.

It was made clear by Harry's tired eyes, the looks she caught Ron giving her as if he was preparing to miss her or trying to let go, or the faltering smiles Hermione gave when she was so deep in thought for such a light hearted conversation. What was worse and most obvious was the unusual behavior they had been battling with all summer. The golden trio's constant indecisions to remain close or disconnected. The pushing away and the clinging on was something Ginny was trying to endure without complaining or reciprocating.

For Ginny there was the constant and intense need to make the most of the summer with the people she loved. She held onto the memories as best she could. This seemed to be everyone's general consensus. She cringed at the recollection of Hermione attempting to fly again and failing miserably. She loved every time she beat Harry to the snitch in their backyard pick up quidditch matches. She grinned to herself remembering the look on the twins' faces when they accidentally singed off their eyebrows thanks to their newest intrigue in fireworks. It was priceless as they quickly jumped to blame the other, stopped in awe over the display and then swiftly went back to work making it bigger and better. Even the smallest ideas of a night even if she couldn't remember the entire moment, like everyone crammed together around an enlarged magicked table eating her Mum's cooking, Ron and Harry battling at Wizards Chess, or giggling with Hermione about something girly were engrained in her memory.

She sighed and turned over again as she thought of the fact she should be sleeping right now. But sleeping was a waste of time. Why, because soon she'd be alone. And being alone, the only one unable to fight this impending battle against Lord Voldermort, was what had been unsettling her thoughts most at night.

Tonight it had become overbearing and Ginny could not take the anxiety any longer. Jumping from bed she winced as her feet hit the cold floor and quickly pulled on slippers and a robe over her nightgown. Quietly, not wanting to wake anyone, she padded her way along the corridors, down the stairs and through the house to the kitchen. Ginny busied herself making the best Molly Weasley remedy for a restless night, warmed milk with a bit of cinnamon. She sat down in front of the waning kitchen fire and abruptly became lost listening to the cracking and spitting of the flames. She let her thoughts swallow her whole.

Not being able to protect and fight for the ones she loved seemed the cruelest form of punishment imaginable. How was she supposed to live with herself after the battle was over knowing she had done nothing to save her family and friends… A defiant tear rolled down Ginny's cheek, she had reached a decision. It had always come down to this. Even through all the sleepless nights, she knew it had but tonight she had accepted it. No matter what happened when the final battle commenced she would fight and no one could stop her.

"Ginny?" She pulled her gaze away from the hypnotizing flames of the fire.

"Hi Ron." Her voice sounded tired even to her.

"What are you doing up?" He asked concerned but couldn't stifle his yawn. 'Gods it's eating him too. Has he even talked to Hermione and Harry about this' she thought sadly.

"I could ask you the same question," she couldn't stop her yawn and laughed at Ron.

"I was uh, just heading back to bed." Again Ron gave her one of those I'm so sorry looks. Ginny sighed, her heart ached for her big brother, always trying to do the right thing. She got up and before she walked upstairs she gave Ron a hug.

"I know and it's okay," She whispered.

"Thank you."

It was all that was needed and the two had a silent understanding that only siblings could have. Together they walked upstairs each feeling a little weight off their shoulders and a bit better about the months to come.


End file.
